Only Dreamin Fast
by littleklainemonster
Summary: This is kind of what happened if Kurt hadn't been to Dalton Academy in season 2! Kurt feels a little bit lonely because he misses the contact to other boys even if he would never admit it! But that's until a new student arrives at McKinley!
1. Chapter 1

**It's Only Dreamin' Fast**

It was Monday morning and Kurt Hummel jumped out of his car, hurrying to the school while clutching a few book to his chest for which wasn't enough space in his satchel. He entered the school building with fast steps to avoid Karofsky and the other jocks who were usually arriving just a few minutes from now. He turned around to look if they had already arrived but there was no one in the parking lot.

"Thank god",he said to himself ,turning around the corner just to bump again something hard. Or someone,he realized...  
Kurt felt his books falling to the ground and stumbled backwards against the lockers, hitting his head and sliding to the ground. He felt confused in the first place,ignoring the pain in his head. Considering he has been too late to avoid the jocks he looked up very slowly and got himself ready to run or apologize before something really bad could happen to him. Like a slushy in his styled hair or a maybe a fist in his face...Nobody had really punched him but in the last weeks he got more and more attacked by the jocks and he just knew that someday the emotional pain wouldn't be enough for them anymore. They seemed to be very eager to make his life the hell on earth. Kurt wasn't even afraid any more. He just knew it would happen and he couldn't change anything. So when he turned his gaze up to the person standing in front of him he was surprised seeing an extended hand in front of him and a face he doesn't know.

It was a boy standing in front of him with a worried expression on his face. The boy was pretty. Kurt realized. Gorgeous actually. His skin was lightly tanned and he had dark gelled hair and pretty hazel eyes which looked sympathetically down at Kurt.  
Kurt felt frozen and unable to do anything except of staring at the other boy. The boy looked more and more worried and opened his mouth to say something:

"Are you hurt? Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry I just wasn't looking!",he said.  
Kurt opened his mouth but nothing came out he just kept staring.

"Oh my god,you're really hurt. I'm so sorry!I should have..."  
"No!",Kurt managed to say "That was actually my fault!" He tried to get up and looked at the boy's still outstretched hand.  
"C'mon ,I'll help you",the boy said.  
Kurt took the boy's hand hesitantly like he thought the boy could change his mind and pull it away before he could take it. But he didn't. He just pulled Kurt to his feet and looked at him with his eyes still looking worried.  
"Do your head hurt pretty bad?", he asked while he picked up some of Kurt's books.  
"No, actually it's fine!It really wasn't that bad!" ,Kurt lied. He felt a pounding in his head and he knew he was getting a headache.  
"I'm so sorry", the boy repeated when he handed Kurt his books back "I'm new here and I didn't know where to go so I was a little bit lost in my thoughts..."

"It's okay,really", Kurt assured smiling at the other boy. " I wasn't paying attention either!"

The boy in front of him smiled back then and Kurt felt like this smile could light up the whole world. He looked at the boy more closely. He was actually a little bit smaller than Kurt and was wearing dark jeans, a squared shirt under a gray sweater vest and a bow tie. Kurt looked at him in surprise. Nobody at McKinley was wearing bow ties except for him. Kurt noticed that he was staring when the other boy cleared his throat and began to speak.

"Hmm,let's say we both didn't pay much attention" , he said "By the way:My name is Blaine"

He offered his hand to Kurt.  
"Kurt", Kurt managed to say and took the boy's- no,Blaine's -hand and shook it gently.

"So,where do you have your first class?" ,Kurt asked just to say something.

"I have actually no idea" Blaine laughed. He had actually a very nice laugh. Everything about Blaine seemed to be nice but Kurt didn't have the time to get lost in his thoughts at the moment.

"My schedule says I'm going to have chemistry first but I've no idea where I've to go",Blaine said still smiling.  
Kurt's face lit up. "That's no problem! The chemistry rooms are just around the corner! If you hurry up you won't be late!"

Blaine took a glance at his watch. "Shit,I really have to hurry!I don't want to be late for my first day at my new school. Thanks for the help,Kurt", he said and smiled at him again.

"No, problem" Kurt smiled back. "Maybe we see each other later.", he said.  
"Yeah,that would be nice. See you" ,Blaine said and smiled at Kurt one last time before he turned around the corner and out of Kurt's sight.  
"See ya...", Kurt mumbled still looking at the spot were Blaine disappeared. He just stand there alone for a few before he noticed that he was supposed to be in his English lesson by now. So he walked slowly away,the books clutched to his chest again his mind wandering to the nice guy he just met. This day was actually starting very nice...

Kurt was disappointed. He hadn't seen Blaine the whole day. They hadn't any classes together and at lunch break he didn't see Blaine either. He didn't know why he wanted to see Blaine so badly. Maybe it was because Kurt was really missing the contact to other boys. Sure he was gay but that didn't mean that he didn't want to be friends with boys. He loved his girls and he knew that they loved him but sometimes it wasn't enough. Not that he would ever admit it to anyone of them. It was stupid to miss contact to the boys. They had a stupid sense of humor, no sense in fashion and smelled pretty bad sometimes. The only boy he was speaking to was his step brother Finn and Kurt couldn't say that he was the best company. He played video games all the time or he was eating. Nothing Kurt really liked. Sure, he liked his brother and there was a time he also had a crush on him -a time Kurt didn't like to think about- but Finn wasn't the best guy to talk to. The boys in Glee-club barely talked to him and they never invited him to anything and -even if he would never admit it- he missed just to have stupid conversations with them. He sometimes felt a little bit lonely.

No,he reminded himself,you have the girls and you like chatting with them. You love to go shopping and to have lazy evenings with them! But he didn't lose the feeling that something was missing...

Kurt sighed and shook his head. He wouldn't think about it now, there was Glee practice and he didn't want that the girls to ask him questions about his bad mood. So when he arrived at the choir room he planted a smile on his face and seated himself on his usual chair next to Mercedes. The chair next to him was empty as always...  
No,he reminded himself, you're happy with what you have. Now stop to think about it and greet Mercedes.  
"Hey, Mercedes" , he said and smiled at her.  
"Hy, Kurt", she smiled back "How was French?"

"C'était bien", he replied and grinned at her.

Mercedes just rolled her eyes at his perfect French accent and began to talk about her weekend when Mr Schuester walked in to the room.  
"Hey guys!" ,he said. "Guess what. I have a surprise for you! A new member!"

He pointed to the door and Kurt's eyes widened in surprise. Blaine was walking in. The Blaine he was talking to this morning. The Blaine he has missed all day even if he barely knew him.

When Blaine saw Kurt he smiled at him and Kurt just smiled back, grinning like a fool. Mercedes raised one eyebrow in confusion.

"Do you two know each other?", she whispered. Looking from Kurt to Blaine and back to Kurt.

"Ühm,yeah. I just sort of walked into him this morning",Kurt giggled.

Before Mercedes could say anything else, Mr Schuester began to speak:

"Maybe you could introduce yourself to the others", he smiled at Blaine.

"Üh,yeah. My name's Blaine Anderson and I transferred from Dalton Academy. I love to sing and that's why I'm here",he said smiling. He seemed to be a little bit nervous to be the new one but tried not to show it.

"Great!", Mr Shue clapped his hands. "Take a seat Blaine."

Blaine began to walk to the chairs and -to everyone's surprise- took the chair next to Kurt and not one next to the other boys.

"Nice to see you again",he said to Kurt, smiling.

Kurt just smiled unable to say anything.

"Damn", Santana groaned. "Totally Hummel's team!"

Brittany looked at her: "You mean he's a dolphin?" Santana just nodded.

Blaine look confused and opened his mouth to ask something but Mr Shue cut into his words.

"Hmm,Blaine?You're new here so if you want you can sing a song.", he said.

Blaine smiled as he answered: "I'd like to but maybe we could do a number all together, so they can hear my voice and I can hear their!"

He looked a little bit self conscious as he explained his suggestion but Mr Schuester just smiled at him:

"That's a great idea actually! But you chose the song"

Blaine thought about it a few seconds and then he answered:

"What about Maroon 5's "Moves like Jagger"?", he proposed.

Everybody murmured in agreement, happy with the idea.

Mr Shue clapped his hand again: "Then, let's go to the auditorium and everybody should think about a few dance moves!" He winked at Finn who looked at him in shock.

"C'mon guys!"

Kurt felt a little bit self conscious to perform in front of Blaine but when the music started he switched to his performer mode and began to dance along with the others. Blaine had agreed to open the number. Everybody was watching Blaine as he opened his mouth and began to sing:

_Just shoot for the stars_

_If it feels right_

_Then aim for my heart_

_If you feel like_

_Can take me away and make it okay_

_I swear I'll behave_

Blaine was good. No he was amazing. His voice was smooth and nice and he moved great along with the music. Kurt looked at him in amazement. This boy was perfect! He was good looking, had a great style and he could sing and dance like a god! Kurt almost forgot to dance for a minute. After Blaine's verse ended, Artie began to sing and after him Brittany started. Kurt had to concentrate not to miss his entry. He heard Mercedes voice like it was far away because he was so lost in his thoughts about Blaine. But he knew he had to concentrate if he didn't want to miss his part.

_You want to know how to make me smile_

_Take control ,own me just for the night_

_But if I share my secret _

_You gonna have to keep it_

_Nobody else can see this_

And then it was his turn. And Kurt became one with the song. He just felt the beat in his heart and it felt like he had never sung like this before.

_So watch and learn_

_I won't show you twice_

_Head to toe,ooh baby,roll me right_

_But if I share my secret _

_You gonna have to keep it_

_Nobody else can see this...hey,ey,ey,yeah!_

Kurt felt sort of disappointed when his verse ended but he felt Blaine's impressed gaze on him and so he just smiled widely at him, blushing widely.

When the song was over, everyone was breaking into applause. Laughing and clapping they collapsed on the floor and tried to catch their breaths.

"Wow,guys that was fantastic", Mr Schuester said, still clapping his hands.

After a few minutes sitting on the floor and catching their breaths, Blaine walked over to were Mercedes and Kurt were sitting and seated himself next to them.

With a smile he said: "Wow,all of you are so talented! But I've to say I've never heard voices quiet like yours! You two are amazing!"

Kurt grinned at him, wanting to return the compliment but not finding his voice to say it so he just kept smiling.

"I think I like you, new kid", Mercedes said with a wink.

Blaine laughed and Kurt could only agree with her...


	2. Chapter 2

**So guys, this is my new chapter!I really need your reviews to know if it's good and what I could change to make it better. Enjoy reading!:)**

Glee practice that day was fun. Like really fun! Kurt did really enjoy it, mostly because of Blaine. After their "Moves like Jagger" performance ,everybody asked Blaine a lot of questions and he replied to all of them very politely. Kurt and Mercedes waited a little bit in the background because they didn't want to overstrain him with to much question. They had time to ask him later, maybe after school or the next day.

At the end of glee practice, when Kurt and Mercedes wanted to go, Blaine was still crowded by the other members. They shouted their good-byes and were on their way to leave the building, talking about the songs they wanted to rehearse, when they heard fast foot-steps behind them.

"Hey", a voice shouted which Kurt recognized immediately.

He turned around with a smile planted on his face and looked at Blaine questioning but friendly.

"Do you need something?", Mercedes asked also smiling at the boy in front of them.

Blaine suddenly looked a little bit embarrassed. He scratched his neck looking at his feet while he answered.

"Well...", he said slowly. "I just wondered...You two seemed to be very nice and maybe we could ...uhm get a coffee or something? I don't really know where to get coffee in Lima...so..."

He looked up at them carefully, meeting their eyes and blushed lightly. He looked very shy and, Kurt couldn't deny it, very cute.

"Of course!", Mercedes said and sent Blaine her brightest smile.

"Maybe we could go to the Lima Bean", Kurt suggested and blushed as Blaine's eyes met his.

Mercedes looked at both of them one eyebrow raised before she replied: "Yeah,they've the best coffee in Lima, let's just meet there this afternoon at 5 pm.! Do you think you could find it, Blaine?"

"Uhm,yeah I think I could!", Blaine said tearing his gaze away from Kurt to look at Mercedes.

"Cool,then we'll see you later!", she smiled so wide she was almost grinning. "Bye!"

"Bye", Kurt murmured, unable to keep himself from blushing brightly.

"See you then",Blaine replied smiling at them one last time before turning around the corner.

"He seems to be a nice guy", Mercedes smiled looking at Kurt.

"Yeah, you're right", Kurt just answered looking at the floor, trying not to blush to bright.

They walked to the parking lot in silence, Kurt's gaze never leaving the ground in front of him.

Maybe this week wouldn't start as bad as he thought...

It was a few minutes past 5 pm and Kurt hurried toward the Lima Bean. He was too late. Only because he was nervous. He had arrived fifteen minutes to early in the parking lot and so he thought that he could wait a few minutes in his Navigator until Mercedes would arrive. But then his phone had rung and after a quick look on the display he saw that Mercedes was calling him. He had been confused: why was she calling him now?

"Hey Mercedes, what's wrong?...Yes,I'm already here...Wha-...What do you mean, you're not coming? Family problems? You've never family problems! No,you can't b-...Mercedes!...No,no I won't go in there!I won't! Not alone!...No,I'm not nervous!...No, I'm not!Why should I?...No,I-...No-...Okay. Okay I'll go!...yeah...bye...No!I've already told you,I'm not nervous!"

He was nervous. He had never been this nervous in his whole life. It had taken him more than fifteen minutes to get out of his car. This fifteen minutes he had spent proving his hair in the back mirror and telling himself that there was no need to be nervous. This was no date! He didn't even know if Blaine was gay!

But after he had had the courage to get out of his Navigator he had discovered that the reasons not to be nervous weren't as good as he had thought. His nerves were still killing him.

And now as he saw Blaine sitting at a table in the Lima Bean through the window, he was so close to just run away and never ever come back again. But then he took a closer look at Blaine. There was this beautiful boy sitting all alone at this table, looking as nervous as Kurt felt. He looked so lonely that Kurt's heart ached. So he took a deep breath and walked through the door and, with a natural looking smile (he hoped it looked natural and not totally uncomfortable), towards Blaine's table.

Blaine, who had been looking at his hands the whole time, looked up as he realized that someone was standing in front of him. As his eyes met Kurt's, he smiled and Kurt's knees began to feel weak.

This eyes! He loved this hazel eyes even if he just knew them for one day but somehow he felt like he had known them forever and this lips...

"Hy", he heard Blaine's voice through the crowds in his head.

Kurt realized that he was staring and shook his head lightly.

"Hey", Kurt said and forced the smile back on his lips. He took the chair at the opposite of the table and removed his jacket while he spoke. "I'm so sorry, I'm late but there was a traffic jam and then Mercedes just called and...ühm...she isn't coming!"

The traffic jam was definitely a lie but what else should he say? 'I was too nervous to get out of my car and I was so close to just run away because you're pretty gorgeous and, while we only know each other for one day, I might have a crush on you. By the way, are you gay? Because it's like I always like straight guys!' No, definitely not!

"Oh", Blaine looked at him, looking a little pale. "So it's just the two of us?"

"Ühm yeah", Kurt said flushing. "It seems so..."

There was a uncomfortable silence until Blaine raised his voice:

"What do you want to drink? I'll pay."

"Oh,no you don't have to invite me", Kurt said quickly.

Blaine looked at him pleasantly: "But I want to."

So Kurt just smiled awkwardly at him and said: "A Grande nonfat mocha, please"

Blaine nodded with a small smile still on his lips and stood up to get their coffee.

Kurt looked after him and found himself looking at Blaine's ass. He tore his gaze away quickly, blushing brightly red.

When Blaine was back with their coffee, Kurt hoped that most of his blush had disappeared but he wasn't sure.

Blaine passed him his Grand nonfat mocha and Kurt smiled at him thankfully. No boy had ever invited him to a coffee or something...

Again there was a small silence and Kurt realized that he should maybe say something.

"So,Blaine",the name felt strange on his tongue. "You...ühm...transferred from Dalton."

"Üh...yeah. I did. It was really awesome there. I was in their Glee club too. They are called The Warblers!" Blaine smiled at the memories.

Then suddenly Kurt realized that he had seen Blaine before. The New Directions were at Sectionals last year and The Warblers had been there too. They'd both won the first place and went both to Regionals.

He wondered why he hadn't remembered Blaine's face earlier.

"Yeah, I remember you singing at Sectionals and Regionals! You were amazing", Kurt said unable to stop himself but Blaine just smiled at the compliment.

"Thanks", he said. "You guys were really great too! Did you won the Nationals?", Blaine asked.

Kurt just smiled sadly at him. "No, we didn't. But this year we'll try again."

Blaine nodded and took a bit of his coffee. Now Kurt was a little bit curious.

"Why did you transfer schools?", he asked.

"Me and my family moved from Westerville to Lima and they said I could visit a school here now." Blaine told him and added with a wink: "And I was tired wearing the Dalton uniform every day."

Kurt laughed and felt a lot of his nervousness falling from him.

"Oh yeah, I couldn't imagine myself wearing the same as all the other students. It would be terrible!" Kurt shuddered a bit and Blaine began to laugh.

"It was terrible!", he said between his laughs. "And the baddest thing about it:" Blaine leaned forward a little bit. "They didn't were bow ties!"

They both began to laugh loudly and after a few minutes they found themselves in a headed conversation about fashion.

Kurt hadn't had this much fun in years!

**C'mon guys please review,I just need to know if I should continue!**


	3. Chapter 3

Kurt couldn't remember that he'd ever had this much fun in his whole life! Blaine was so nice to talk to and Kurt really enjoyed himself! They had already talked for two full hours but they had still enough to talk about and Kurt didn't want it ever to stop. After they talked a lot about fashion, their conversation went to their favorite Vogue covers and finally they began talking about their favorite movies and Broadway shows and realized that they had a lot in common. They had finished their coffee long ago but they just didn't care. Kurt began to feel more comfortable with Blaine around and Blaine seemed not to feel uncomfortable anymore,too.

Just as they began a headed conversation about their favorite songs in "Wicked", Kurt's phone beeped to tell him that he had a new message. He looked at the screen and opened the message quickly to not let Blaine wait too long.

_Are you still with Blaine?:P  
Call me when you're home, I want to know EVERYTHING!_

_Mercedes_

Kurt just smiled at the message and put his phone back into his pocket without replying. Blaine looked at him questioningly.

"Have to go home?", he asked with a little, almost sad, smile on his lips.

"Oh,no!No!I still have...",Kurt looked at the clock on the wall next to them."...an hour, actually!"

He grinned at Blaine and Blaine's smile widened.

"Ühm,do you want to...ühm..maybe have a little walk outside? It starts to get uncomfortable to sit here all the time!", Blaine said a tiny smile still on his lips.

"That's a great idea!", Kurt said and got up to put his jacket on.

"But I need another coffee before we go!", Blaine said while he put his jacket on. "Do you want another too?"

"Yes, but this time I'll pay!", he said and winked at Blaine who smiled. "What do you drink?"

"A medium drip please", Blaine answered and Kurt went to get their drinks.

When Kurt came back, Blaine was already waiting at the door. Kurt handed him his coffee. Their hands brushed for a moment and Kurt looked up only to find Blaine's gaze on him. He blushed deeply and quickly tore his gaze away to look at the floor in front of him. For a moment they just stood there in silence and Kurt was searching for something he could say when Blaine cleared his throat.

"Ready to go?", he asked, cheeks a little pink, and opened the door.

Kurt just nodded and went outside. He smiled when he realized that Blaine held the door open for him. They started to walk through the little park next to the Lima Bean and walked in silence until Kurt raised his voice.

"Sooo,were did we stop talking", he asked tearing his gaze from the path to meet Blaine's eyes.

He was happy that it was already dawning outside and he hoped Blaine wasn't able to see that he was blushing again.

"Err, we stopped talking when you told me that "Defying Gravity" is your favorite song from "Wicked". It's my favorite too, by the way.", Blaine said and Kurt could only barely see that he was smiling softly.

From there they continued their conversations and walked through the park slowly. They just finished talking about "Rent" and fell into a comfortable silence when they spotted a bank at the end of the path. They sat down and drank their coffee in silence. Kurt wasn't sure where to look and so he just stared into the distance. When he felt Blaine's gaze on him, he looked up slowly until his eyes met Blaine. But this time Blaine didn't tear his gaze away, he just kept looking and Kurt found himself unable to take his eyes off Blaine. They sat like this until Blaine opened his mouth to say something.

"Ühmm, I really enjoyed this afternoon! You're really nice and it's fun to talk to you!", he smiled shyly at Kurt as he spoke.

Kurt smiled back and said: "You're really nice too and it's great to talk to somebody who knows that Alexander McQueen is actually a designer and no Scottish prince or something!"

He rolled his eyes. Blaine only laughed and after a moment Kurt joined in and laughed with him. It felt so natural and great and Kurt just loved it.

They sat in silence again and Kurt took a look at his phone. He sighed. He really had to go if he didn't want to have trouble with his father. Blaine looked up at him:

"Gotta go home now?", he asked, looking a bit sad again.

Kurt only nodded and they got up and walked slowly towards the parking lot. After a moment Blaine said:

"Uuh,there was one thing, I really wanted to ask you!"

Kurt looked up at him, waiting.

"What were those two girls, ühm Santana and Brittany ?,...", Blaine looked questioningly at Kurt and Kurt nodded in reply. "... meaning when they said I was your team or a dolphin?"

Damn. Kurt should have expected this question. But he didn't feel himself prepared to answer it. Should he lie? What if Blaine wasn't gay? Maybe he would be angry. Kurt thought about it. No, he would find out anyway and he didn't really want to lie to Blaine and he also was very curious. But how should he say it?

"Well,...ühm...Brittany says that...well...dolphins are just gay sharks!", he said hoping that Blaine got what he wanted to say.

For a moment Blaine just looked confused but then he began to laugh. And Kurt didn't know how to interpret this laugh.

"Well", Blaine said still laughing a bit. "That's nice! I've never heard that before. But well, in fact she was right! I'm gay! I wonder how she got to know..."

Kurt didn't really listen anymore to what Blaine was saying. Blaine was gay! He was close to just scream in delight or laugh out happily but he stayed quiet. He had never met another gay guy. This had to be a dream! A very nice dream actually!

Kurt realized that Blaine was looking at him as if he waited for an answer.

"Huh,sorry what did you say?", he looked at Blaine apologizing.

"Ühm, I just wondered", Blaine began hesitantly. "why Santana said I'm your team...ühmm..are you..."

"I'm gay!", Kurt said grinning widely before Blaine could even finish his question. He blushed deeply and smiled carefully at Blaine who smiled back very widely.

After a few minutes in silence, they arrived at the parking lot.

"Well, there's my car", Kurt said pointing at his Navigator.

"Oh,okay", Blaine said as if he had been far away with his thoughts. "I really enjoyed this! We should meet again, should we?"

"Of course", Kurt replied smiling brightly at Blaine. "I'd like to! Well, I guess we see each other at school tomorrow!"

"Yeah", Blaine replied, looking to the ground as he took one step toward Kurt.

Before Kurt knew what Blaine was doing, he found Blaine's arms around him, hugging him briefly but tightly. Blaine blushed as he stepped away form Kurt and their eyes met but Kurt just smiled at him.

"Goodbye, Blaine", Kurt said softly, smiling at Blaine one last time before he turned around to get to his Navigator.

He only heard Blaine's voice very quietly behind him whispering a soft goodbye. Once he was in his Navigator he couldn't stay quiet and a small cry of happiness escaped his mouth.

He had to be dreaming. Yep, this totally has to be a dream!

Kurt was lying on his bed, phone pressed to his ear. The bright smile was still on his lips while he reported the whole afternoon to Mercedes. She seemed to be very happy about what happened and pleased with her idea not to come.

"I still hate you for leaving me alone", Kurt said into the phone.

"Oh, please I can hear that you're smiling! And I wasn't leaving you alone...I had...what was the reason I couldn't come?", Mercedes asked cheerful.

"Family problems", Kurt replied rolling his eyes even if she couldn't see it through the phone.

"Oh,right!", she said. "Right, I had family problems! And they made me very tired. So I just think I go to sleep now. Night, Kurt! Sweet dreams about Blainie."

"Oh, I hate you", he said laughing into the phone.

"No, you don't! And you should sleep to!", she answered. "Good night."

"Night", Kurt said smiling and ended the call.

Kurt got under the blanket then and turned the lamp on his bedside drawer off.

Of course he and Blaine had exchanged their phone numbers and one moment Kurt thought about sending Blaine a short message but he decided that it was too early. So he just switched his phone off and closed his eyes. He went to sleep very quickly, the tiny smile still on his lips.


	4. Chapter 4

It was Thursday morning and Kurt stood in front of his locker and checked his hair in the little mirror inside his locker. He took the can of hairspray which he was always taking with him and sprayed some on his, already perfectly styled, hair.

It had taken him a lot longer to decide for one outfit and to style his hair this morning and Kurt exactly knew the reason for it: Blaine. He really wanted to look good for Blaine and he hoped that he didn't look as nervous as he really was. The whole morning Kurt's heart had been beating a lot faster than usual and Kurt thought it was very stupid. They only hugged one time! But for Kurt this silly, little hug meant a lot. No boy was ever hugging him. The boys in Glee club liked to have a safety distance between themselves and him, the gay boy. They never said anything like that to Kurt but he felt it. Finn was no exception: He was always friendly and it wasn't like they never talked to each other but Finn avoided to have to much body contact like sitting to close to him on the couch or something. And Kurt hated it, he hated that everyone of the boys acted like he was kind of poisonous. So Kurt figured out that his lack of body contact to other boys was the reason for his excitement about Blaine's hug. Nothing more and nothing less. He stopped fixing his hair and shut his locker determined. He started walking towards the class room and tried to clam his nerves with repeating the same sentences over and over again. There's nothing to be excited about! Blaine hugged you and you liked it! But you don't have a crush on him, you just want to be his friend!

But as he entered his classroom and saw Blaine sitting at one of the tables, looking way to gorgeous he knew that he was lying to himself: He totally had a crush on Blaine!

As Blaine, who had been reading something, looked up and his gaze fell on Kurt standing in the door way, his face lit up and he smiled sweetly at Kurt. Kurt felt a flip in his stomach and took one deep breath before he walked towards Blaine to take the empty seat next to him.

"Hey Kurt, nice to see you", Blaine said when Kurt was close enough to hear him.

Kurt smiled at him: "Nice to see you too! I didn't know we had English together!"

"Oh, me neither but I'm happy to have some classes with you!", he said.

Kurt raised one eyebrow at that, smiling, and Blaine blushed and looked down at the table.

Kurt felt like he had to say something, so he answered very shyly: "I'm happy to spent some of my school time with you too."

Blaine looked at him, his checks still a little pink, and smiled very sweetly at him. There was a silence and both of them looked down at their hands not knowing what to say. Just then their teacher entered the room and Kurt felt like he had never been this happy to see his teacher. They started with the lesson and did some of the work together, smiling all the time at each other. At the end of the lesson the teacher told them about a project she wanted to do and said that everyone needed a partner for this. Kurt and Blaine immediately looked at each other and blushed a little bit.

"Uh,do you maybe want to do the project...with me?", Blaine asked slowly. "But if you don't want to it's okay.", he added quickly, his gaze dropping to his hands.

Kurt looked at him surprised: "Of course I want to do this project with you. Don't be silly!" He smiled warmly at Blaine when he looked up and the other boy hesitantly smiled back.

When the bell rang, they packed their things and left the classroom to attend their next classes. Kurt had French next and Blaine had physics. After they agreed to spend their lunch break together they said goodbye and headed to their classes.

When the lunch break began, Kurt hurried to the cafeteria to meet Blaine in time. Blaine was already standing in front of it waiting for Kurt. After they greeted each other, they got their food and walked towards the table where the whole Glee club was seating. Kurt took his usual seat next to Mercedes and motioned Blaine to sit next to him. Kurt felt somebody's gaze on him and turned his head to Mercedes who was smirking at him. He nudged her with his elbow and frowned at her. But she only laughed and continued to argue with Rachel who was talking about being the greatest star in Lima. Kurt only rolled his eyes and started to eat.

After a while Blaine asked Kurt: "So,when will we meet?"

A few of the New Directions looked at them surprised and interested, so Blaine, blushing a little bit, quickly added: "For our English project, I mean."

Kurt ignored the staring eyes on them and tried to not to show his excitement as he spoke: "We could meet today. Maybe in the Lima Bean?", he asked.

"Yeah, we could get some coffee then. Yeah,that sounds nice.", Blaine answered happily and smiled.

Kurt smiled back and ate his salad. Brittany then began to talk about her weekend and Kurt quickly joined the conversation. After a while Blaine joined in too. They laughed a lot until the lunch break ended. Kurt stood up then and walked with everyone out of the cafeteria.

"See you in Glee club, guys!", he said and smiled at them. After giving Blaine a special smile, he turned around and walked towards the classroom to attend his class.

Everybody was already there, when Kurt entered the choir room and Kurt plumed down on the chair between Blaine and Mercedes.

"Hey guys!", he said smiling at them.

"Hy", Blaine said smiling back.

"Hey Kurt", Mercedes said. "We were just talking about you!"

Kurt blushed and looked at her questioningly. "What were you talking about?"

"Okay, actually we didn't talk about you but about the song you're going to sing today", Mercedes explained and winked at him. "I really want to know what it is!"

Kurt smiled: "You're going to hear it when Mr Shue is here! Until then you've to wait."

He then turned to Blaine who had been quiet while he talked to Mercedes. "How were your lessons?"

Blaine pulled a face: "In fact okay but in math I had to work with one of the jocks and he didn't know anything so I had to do all the work. And he insulted me for being in Glee club." He shrugged his shoulders. "But the other classes were okay."

"Don't listen to the jocks.", Kurt said. "They just have nothing to do instead of insulting us or throwing slushies at us!"

Blaine looked at him confused: "Slushies?"

"Yeah", Kurt answered and shrugged. "They like to throw them over your head if you don't watch out! So be carefully and avoid contact with them!" He winked at Blaine.

Mr Schuster then came into the room. "Hey guys, I'm sorry for being late!" He looked at each of them and smiled. "Kurt, do you want to start?"

Kurt nodded and climbed off his chair and walked towards the center of the room. He really wanted to do this number even if normally he would chose something else to perform like a song from a musical or something. He was a little bit unsure what the others would think about his performance but then the music started and he switched into his performer mode and began to sing.

_Na, na, na, na, na_

_Come on!_

_Na, na, na, na, na_

_Come on!_

He then started to dance, moving his hips to the music. He enjoyed the surprised expression on everybody's face, especially on Blaine's who was watching him with big eyes and Kurt started to feel more confident.

_Feels so good being bad (Oh oh oh oh oh) _

_There's no way I'm turning back (Oh oh oh oh oh) _

_Now the pain is my pleasure 'cause nothing could measure(Oh oh oh oh oh)_

Mr Shue was the only one who knew about his song choice and he smiled at him encouragingly. When the refrain began, Kurt was totally in his element and felt again like he was one with the music.

_'Cause I may be bad, but I'm perfectly good at it _

_Sex in the air, I don't care, I love the smell of it _

_Sticks and stones may break my bones _

_But chains and whips excite me_

The surprise on everybody's face had quickly turned to enthusiasm and everybody was clapping in tact to the music and to Kurt's dancing. Blaine looked really impressed and Kurt wanted this moment never to end. He gave everything in the last few lines and ended the song.

_S-S-S & M-M-M _

_S-S-S & M-M-M _

_S-S-S & M-M-M _

_S-S-S & M-M-M_

Everybody was clapping enthusiastically and Kurt bowed a few times before Mr Shue raised his voice: "Wow, Kurt that was...", he made a little pause like he was searching for words. "amazing!", he said still clapping.

Kurt smiled at him and returned to his seat. Everybody was shouting his compliments to him and Kurt felt amazing. Blaine was still watching him with big eyes and I took him a moment to find the right words.

"Wow,that was...impressing.", Blaine said. "Perfect. Your voice it perfect and..", Blaine blushed a little bit. "...I liked the...ühm...performance!"

Kurt then blushed too but smiled at him. "Thank you!", he said softly and felt his heart beating a little bit faster.

This day had been totally great, Kurt decided. He hadn't had any problems with any of the jocks, he had a reason to meet Blaine again and everybody liked his performance! And to make the day even more perfect, he was going to meet Blaine later, alone!

The smile on Kurt's lips stayed there through the whole Glee club meeting.

**So,what do you guys think:D I used S&M because of the interview in which Chris said that he really wanted to perform the song;)**


	5. Chapter 5

Kurt was sitting in the Lima Bean waiting for Blaine. He was like half an hour to early but he didn't care. He left his home extra early because he didn't want to be late again but he hadn't expected to arrive this early. So he just went into the Lima Bean, sat down as the same table he and Blaine were sitting at yesterday and waited for Blaine. He looked nervously to the door and felt his heart beating faster every time someone entered the coffee shop. He hated himself for being so nervous but he couldn't help it: He was going to have coffee with an amazing boy who was actually gay, had a great sense for fashion and, Kurt hoped that he wasn't just imagining it, seemed to like him. Kurt's mind drifted away with his thoughts about Blaine and he found himself thinking how great he looked with his dark hair, his hazel eyes, his full lips...

"Hey" Kurt heard a voice saying and had to blink a few times to clear his vision.

Blaine was standing in front of him, smiling and was looking ever more gorgeous than Kurt remembered. For a few seconds Kurt found himself unable to react or say something so he just opened his mouth and stared at the boy in front of him. Blaine began to look a bit insecure and raised one eyebrow questioningly.

"Kurt?", Blaine asked, looking down at him his gaze still confused.

Kurt cleared his throat and felt himself relived as found his voice again.

"Uhh,hey Blaine", he said embarrassed. "Sorry, I think I was a little bit...lost in my thoughts." He smiled apologizing.

Blaine then smiled back and put off his jacket and set down at the table.

"No problem", he said still smiling. "In the first moment I thought I had something in my face." He laughed then asked looking conscious again. "There isn't anything in my face, is there?"

"No,no!", Kurt said and realized that Blaine had caught him staring. Your face is perfect, he thought.

"So, what about coffee?", Blaine asked his smile turning into a grin. "It's my turn to pay today,so what do you want? Grand nonfat mocha like yesterday?", he asked smiling sweetly.

"Do we have a plan now about who's going to pay the coffee?", Kurt asked laughing. Blaine just nodded grinning. "And yes Grand nonfat mocha would be nice!"

Blaine walked away from the table to get their coffee and Kurt smiled at the realization that Blaine had remembered his coffee order.

When Blaine walked back to their table, one coffee in each hand, Kurt was still smiling and thanked Blaine when he reached over the table and put the coffee in front of Kurt.

"So, S&M?", Blaine asked looking curious.

"Hmm", Kurt hummed while taking a sip of his coffee.

"Is there any special reason you picked the song?", Blaine asked before putting his coffee to his lips.

"Well, I always wanted to do that number", Kurt admitted blushing a little bit. "I don't know why but I always liked the song even if normally I'm not for this kind of ….lyrics." Kurt blushed a little bit deeper and shrugged.

"I've to admit I was a little bit surprised", Blaine told him. "But I really like it", he added and blushed lightly.

Kurt only smiled and took another sip of his coffee.

They then began to talk about their favorite pop singers and argued about who was better: Kurt's favorite Lady GaGa or Blaine's Katy Perry. They laughed a lot and in the end they decided that both of them were awesome. Two hours and another coffee later they realized their original reason to meet today: they still had their English project to do. So they put on their coats and left the coffee shop. They decided to go to Kurt's house because the public library was already closed and Blaine said that his house was still to messy from the move. So they got in their cars and drove to Kurt's house. When they stand in front of the front door Kurt, realized that nobody was at home and his heart began to beat a little bit faster as he opened the door and they both got into the hall. They got out of their jackets and stood a little bit awkward in the hall.

"So, we could go into my room and start working?", Kurt asked his voice a little bit shaky.

Blaine only nodded and they got up the stairs and into Kurt's room. Kurt motioned Blaine to sit down wherever he wanted and Blaine seated himself on the edge of Kurt's bed. He looked through the room and then to Kurt.

"I like your room", he said smiling. "It really looks like home." Kurt wasn't sure but it looked like Blaine's smile was a little bit sad at that point.

"Thank you", Kurt said softly and seated himself next to Blaine on the bed.

For a moment they just looked at each other and Kurt lost himself in Blaine's hazel eyes.

They didn't say anything for a while until Kurt cleared his throat and said, his voice a little higher than normal: "Maybe we should start with the project if we want to finish it in time."

Blaine nodded, his gaze dropping to the floor and Kurt got a few sheets and two pencils.

They worked at the project for the next two hours, occasionally smiling at each other, and got forward quickly with their work. They then decided to have a break and went into the kitchen to drink some water. Just then Kurt's father came home from work together with Finn and Carole. They walked into the kitchen and Kurt smiled at them a little bit surprised.

"Blaine, buddy, nice to see you here.", Finn said and boxed Blaine on the shoulder.

"Hey Dad, Hey Carole!", Kurt smiled and looked at Blaine who looked a little bit nervous. "This is Blaine. Dad,you know, I told you: He's new at McKinley and were working on an English project together. Blaine this is my dad and my stepmother Carole!"

Burt smiled at Blaine and held his hand towards Blaine. "Nice to meet you"

Blaine took his hand and shook it gently. "Nice to meet you too,sir"

Carole then gave her hand to Blaine and smiled at him. "I'm happy to meet you, sweetheart! I already heard about you." She winked at Kurt who blushed.

"Well, I think we'll go back to work then", Kurt said quickly and dragged Blaine by his shoulders out of the room with him. "I'm sorry. I didn't know they would be home this early!", he said to Blaine.

"Kurt, it's okay", Blaine said and smiled. "They seem to be pretty nice!"

Kurt smiled brightly at him and realized that he had his hands still on Blaine's shoulders. He dropped them quickly and looked to the ground his cheeks pink.

"Well", he said still tearing his gaze from the floor up to Blaine's eyes. "Let's get the work done."

Blaine nodded but neither of them made a move. They just looked each other in the eyes and Kurt saw something in this hazel eyes. Something sad and broken but he didn't think it would be right to ask. After a few seconds in which they just stared at each other Kurt tore his gaze away and smiled softly. They then went back into Kurt's room and worked on the project. It took them another hour before it was finished and Kurt thought that even school work could be fun if he could do it together with Blaine.

"What about a movie?", Kurt asked looking hopefully up to Blaine. "Or do you have to leave now?"

"No, in fact my parents aren't home so it doesn't matter when I come home!", Blaine replied smiling but Kurt thought that his smile looked a little bit sad.

"Okay,so what about 'Evita'?",Kurt asked.

"Yeah, I've never watched it!", Blaine replied.

"We used to watch it every week when I was a kid. Because I liked it so much. Me, Dad and my mother.", Kurt smiled sadly and felt a lump forming in his throat.

There was a little silence before Blaine looked at him. "Kurt?"

Kurt didn't know if he was able to speak so he just hummed in response.

"What...what happened to your mother?", Blaine asked very carefully.

Kurt felt tears welling in his eyes and he gulped. He didn't know why he was so close to cry. His mother has been dead for a long time now and he had talked about it pretty often without crying.

"She died", Kurt choked out tears blurring his vision. "She ha-had an accident."

"I'm so sorry", Blaine answered softly and Kurt looked up, up in this hazel eyes and all the hurt he felt in the last weeks, month and years seemed to overwhelm him suddenly. He had always tried to be strong but he knew he couldn't. He felt a tear running down his cheek. He just wanted to threw himself in Blaine's arms and cry. Cry until everything was better.

"I'm..I'm sorr-rry...I-I don't know...why I cry-y!", Kurt choked out and felt more tears running down his cheeks. "It...it's not just be-because of my mother bu-but because of ev-everything..."

"Shh", Blaine answered. "Don't be sorry for this. I know what you mean. Cry if you have to. I won't judge you. It's okay."

And then Kurt lost it. He couldn't keep the tears from falling and began to shake. Suddenly he felt Blaine's arms around him, holding him tight. He kind of threw himself in Blaine's arms and cried into his sweater. Blaine's hands were rubbing slow circles on his back and after a few minutes his tears finally dried and his body stopped shaking. He felt so calm and safe in Blaine's arms and he wanted to stay like this forever. After a few more minutes he untangled his arms from Blaine and rubbed his eyes.

"I'm sorry", Kurt muttered feeling a little bit embarrassed. "Normally I don't cry."

"Kurt, this is okay",Blaine answered, taking Kurt's hand in his and looking seriously. "I guess you've a lot going on and you can't always be strong! And you don't have to tell me what's going on but if you want to I'll be there." Blaine squeezed Kurt's hand and smiled at him.

Kurt only nodded and tried to smile back, looking down at their entwined hands.

"Thank you", he murmured squeezing Blaine's hand back before letting it go. "So,movie?"

"Yeah", Blaine said and Kurt put in the movie and they seated themselves on Kurt's bed, sitting close to each other.

They sat so close their hands were touching between them and after a few minutes Blaine just took Kurt's hand in his and smiled shyly at Kurt. Kurt only squeezed his hand in reply, feeling his stomach flip and his skin burning. After a few minutes Kurt's head dropped to Blaine's shoulders and Kurt asked himself if this was to much but then he felt Blaine's cheek pressed against his hair and he just sighed in content.

When the film was over it was already dark outside and they slowly sat up and let go of each others hands. Blaine decided that it was time for him to go home and Kurt brought him to the door feeling a little bit disappointed even if he knew Blaine couldn't stay there for the night. They hugged each other goodbye like the day before and Kurt felt butterflies in his stomach.

"Goodnight", Blaine said when he was out of the door. "It was really nice today." He smiled warmly.

"Yeah, it was", Kurt said returning the smile. "Goodnight and drive carefully."

Blaine nodded and turned around to get to his car.

"And thank you", Kurt whispered but he was sure Blaine heard it because he smiled on last time at Kurt before getting into his car.


	6. Chapter 6

It was Friday afternoon and Kurt was lying on his back on Blaine's bed, his head hanging upside down while watching Blaine dancing to the music playing on his i-pod.

It had been two and a half month since they met for the first time and all of the awkwardness was gone. They spent most of their free time and even their time at school together: They got coffee, went to movies or were just hanging out together like this afternoon. They were good friends, no best friends actually and Kurt was thankful for it. It wasn't like he hadn't still a crush on Blaine. In fact the feelings were growing stronger with every minute they spent together but Kurt couldn't just admit them to Blaine. He was to scared that Blaine couldn't feel the same way and that it would break their new created friendship. And Kurt definitely didn't want to screw this up. He had never had a best friend who was actually a male and no girl and Kurt was grateful for it. He was grateful for the time he and Blaine spent together, for the laughter they shared and for how comfortable he felt around Blaine. There were still moments when he felt himself blushing after staring at Blaine or his ass (Kurt couldn't help it) way to long or getting lost in his thoughts about Blaine's lips and how they'd taste like. He found himself wondering about this a lot lately and sometimes he was so close to just lean in, close the gap between their bodies and try it. But he couldn't because he hadn't the the courage to do it and he was afraid of Blaine's reaction. So he stayed Blaine's best friend. Even if it was hard sometimes. But this friendship was one of the best things Kurt had ever experienced and he knew one thing for sure: He didn't want it to stop. He liked being Blaine's friend a lot: He liked going shopping with him, laughing together about the silliest things or just to see his friend smile at him. He even liked studying with him! And Kurt decided that this was worth it! It was worth it to hide his true feelings and to try to forget about them!It had to be worth it!

"Watcha thinking", Blaine asked, still dancing slowly around the room.

"Nothing", Kurt said a little bit to quickly and tried to look innocent.

"C'mon, I can tell! Every time you start thinking about things you just seem to look through me and you don't here anything", Blaine told him smirking. "What is it? Or do I have to tickle you?"

Blaine jumped on the bed and began to tickle Kurt's sides and Kurt heart began to beat faster as they both laughed.

"Stop it", he said between the laughter. "Stop it and I'll tell you!"

Blaine took his hands form his sides and Kurt was annoyed with himself. Why did he have to be so ticklish? He could have Blaine tickle him the whole day, if he wouldn't run so out of breath from it.

Blaine raised one eyebrow in question and Kurt bit his lip. What was he supposed to tell him?

"Uhm, I was just...wondering why I've never met your parents yet. Even if we spent quite a lot time a your house." Kurt lied. But in fact it wasn't really a lie: Kurt had asked himself this question pretty often, only not in this moment...

Blaine laid down next to him on the bed and looked to the ceiling. "You know, I told you they work a lot and they're like never at home." Blaine shrugged but Kurt could hear the little hint of sadness in Blaine's voice which appeared like always when they talked about Blaine's parents.

"But didn't it bother you?", Kurt asked carefully.

Blaine only shrugged again. "It had always been like this. I don't know it any different."

He got up from the bed and looked at Kurt, a tiny smile covering the sad look in his eyes.

"Sooo, what about a movie now?", Blaine asked already looking through the movie's on his desk.

Kurt sighted and got up from the bed. "Fine but I'll choose it!", he said walking towards a grinning Blaine.

Someday Blaine would be ready to tell him about his problems and until then Kurt had to be patient . It seemed like he had to be patient quite a lot in the last months...

On Saturday afternoon Kurt and Mercedes were sitting in the Lima Bean, waiting for Rachel, Blaine and Tina to arrive who had been in the Mall. After the two and a half month Blaine was also very good friends with the girls of the Glee club, mostly with Tina and Brittany. But Blaine and Kurt didn't spent nearly as much time with the girls as together. That was why Kurt had decided to spent this morning alone with Mercedes and not to go shopping with the others. They'd watched a movie and now they were just talking while waiting for the others to arrive. Unfortunately Mercedes began to center their conversation on Blaine.

"So, did he already ask you out on a date?", Mercedes asked, looking curious.

"Mercedes, I told you like 100 times we're just friends!", Kurt explained and sighed, rolling his eyes. He wasn't really in the mood to discus his relationship with Blaine. "Nothing more and nothing less!"

"Oh Kurt, c'mon!", she looked at him with her 'bitch please' expression. "I can tell! Don't you remember what you told me after you first met him alone? How beautiful his eyes are, how nice he is, how much you love his smile, how..."

"Okay stop! Yeah, you're right I had a little crush on him." Kurt answered. "But-"

"Had? A little?", Mercedes nearly laughed. "Please, when you 'had' a 'little' crush on him why are you still looking at him like he's the most beautiful thing you've seen in your life?"

"I'm not-", Kurt tried to answer but Mercedes went on.

"Why are you still standing abnormal close to him?", Mercedes went on. "You were always bad at lying."

Kurt pressed his lips together and looked at the table.

"And please, you don't just have a crush on him!", she rolled her eyes. "You're totally in love with him!"

Kurt tried to protest but Mercedes cut his words again and lay her hand on his.

"Kurt, there was a time when we were like really good friends. Like best friends!", Mercedes looked hurt. "And you told me anything! You know you can trust me, I won't tell a soul!"

Kurt sighed and squeezed her hand. "Don't be stupid you still are my best friend... My best female friend!", he added when Mercedes raised an eyebrow. "And I know I can trust you but...everything is so complicated and I just have to get over it." He sighed again

Mercedes looked friendlier now. "What about a nice girls night with Rachel and me? We could do special skin care, watch a movie eat popcorn...And we could figure something out."

She smiled warmly at Kurt and he squeezed her hand before letting go.

"That's a nice idea", he said and his smile became a grin. "But why Rachel? I think you couldn't stand her. Are you two friends now?" He laughed.

"No,no! I just added Rachel because she's your friend!", Mercedes quickly added. "And she has some good ideas sometimes but I still can't stand her." She grimaced and Kurt laughed.

"Hey guys", they heard Rachel saying before she'd even entered the coffee shop.

"Speaking of the devil...", Mercedes murmured and Kurt had to press his lips together because he nearly laughed out loud.

"Hey everyone", Mercedes said when everyone sat down at their table..

Blaine took his usual seat next to Kurt and smiled at him. Kurt smiled back and Mercedes raised one eyebrow teasingly. Kurt only rolled his eyes and listened to the others talking about their day in the mall.

"It was really nice", Rachel began to babble in her usual nerve-racking voice. "We found a lot of nice clothes."

She then opened her bag and took out a bright yellow dress and a cardigan with little kittens on it. Kurt was so close to laugh out loud so he just pressed his lips together and tried to suppress his laughter. Mercedes just looked at her like she had lost her mind.

"What is wrong with you?", Mercedes asked totally in shock.

Kurt buried his face on Blaine's shoulder to keep himself from laughing and Blaine grinned down at him, his lips pressed together tightly.

"Nothing", Rachel snapped. "It's cute and it is perfect for a cute girl like me! And it matches my new knee-length socks!", she said and took a pair of gray socks out of her bag which had a little head of a cats on it.

And that was when everybody burst into laughter and Rachel just crossed her arms in front of her and pouted. "You can't deny it's cute!", she said but it just made everyone laugh even harder.

After a few minutes when everybody stopped to laugh they began to talk about different things when Rachel raised her voice again.

"And the shopping wasn't the only good thing about this day!", she said, smirking at Blaine. "We met someone"

Kurt was confused and waited for Rachel to go on.

"What do you mean you met someone", Mercedes asked looking from Blaine to Rachel.

"It means...", Rachel said. "...that Blaine has got a date."

In this moment Kurt felt like the world had suddenly come to stop. He felt totally shocked and a lump was forming in his throat. He looked to Blaine, trying to hide the shock in his eyes. Blaine had blushed and was smiling lightly while looking at his hands. Kurt had known that eventually this day would come but he hadn't expected it to be this early. He wanted a little more time with Blaine. He wanted a little more time in which he could pretend that maybe deep inside of him Blaine could feel something for him too.

Kurt gulped and put a fake smile on his face as Blaine looked carefully at him and began to speak.

"Nah, I haven't got a date", he said and Kurt felt a little bit of hope. "We only exchange numbers and he said we could maybe go on a date. But it-"

"C'mon", Rachel cut in his words. "This guys was so trapped by your charm! Did you see how he looked at you."

Mercedes looked to Kurt with an worried expression and then to Blaine. "Are you going to meet him? I mean are you going to attend if he asks?."

Blaine only shrugged.

Kurt took a deep breath, looked at his friend and asked in a strange voice which didn't sound like his. "Did he seem nice?" Blaine nodded in response. "Did he look good?" Blaine nodded again and blushed.

"I think you should go out with him then!" Kurt found himself saying.

**Sooo,what do you guys think?:) **

**And by the way does my English sound a little bit awkward sometimes? Or is it good?;)**


	7. Chapter 7

Kurt felt like crap. Like totally crap.

After the meeting in The Lima Bean he had headed straight home with the excuse his dead wanted him to be home for lunch. That had been a lie. His Dad hadn't even been home. He had just needed to get away from the others. And away from Blaine to clear his thoughts.

Did he really say to Blaine that he should met this guy? Really? He was such an idiot! But on the other hand, Blaine was his best friend and Kurt wanted him to be happy. And somewhere in his head excited the little thought that Blaine could maybe change his mind after meeting this guy and realize that he had feelings for Kurt...

No, Kurt thought to himself, that was absolute impossible and unrealistic. He had had his chance and he hadn't taken it. Blaine deserved someone better, someone who had the courage to show his affection. Blaine deserved to be happy and if this guy could make Blaine happy...fine!

He had tried to convince himself with this thoughts when he had went home from The Lima Bean but it didn't really work out. As soon as he had been home, he had went straight into his room, had fallen face forward onto the bed and begun to cry. He hated himself so bad for being such a coward and for being so madly in love with his best friend. He had cried and cried for hours until he'd realized that he had agreed to Mercedes' girls night. So he had gotten up, tried to make himself look acceptable (what wasn't easy because his eyes were red and swollen from the crying) and went downstairs, dropping a note for his Dad.

He wasn't really in the mood for a girls-night but what else should he do? Staying at home crying? No, he didn't even think that it was even possible to cry more. So he'd packed his things and got into his car. He'd been halfway to Mercedes house when he realized that he hadn't spoken to Mercedes after their meeting in the Lima Bean this morning.

Damn! She was going to ask questions and Kurt wasn't really in the mood to answer to them, mostly because he hadn't even an answer for them.

He sighed and put a hand to his head. All this worries were giving him a head ache. He sighed and pulled into the street in which Mercedes lived. He parked his car, hopped out of it and walked towards the door. Before he could even ring the bell the door opened and Mercedes was standing in front of him, already wearing her purple pajama and looked at him questioningly arms crossed in front of her chest.

"So?", she asked before Kurt could even come in. "What do you have to say?"

Kurt sighed again and closed the door behind him. "Nice to see you too. Yeah I had a nice ride, thanks for asking", he said sarcastically and rolled his eyes.

"Kuuuurt!", Mercedes said warningly.

Kurt looked at her. "What do you want to hear?", he asked a little bit offended.

"I want to hear why the hell you told the boy you're in love with to meet another guy!", she said, her arms still crossed in front of her.

Kurt felt his head ache getting worse. "What should I do? He doesn't like me back and there is another guy liking him. So why shouldn't they just get together and everybody would be happy!", Kurt nearly yelled in frustration.

"Because it makes you unhappy Kurt! Because YOU like him and because YOU and Blaine should be together, not Blaine and another stupid boy!", Mercedes throw her hands over her head.

"You don't even know him", Kurt murmured and looked at her. "And this isn't about me, this is about Blaine! I don't matter in this!", Kurt nearly yelled again.

Mercedes grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him. "Of course you matter! This is about you too! This about your feelings too,Kurt! You have a right to be happy! Why do you give up before you even tried! This isn't like the Kurt I knew! The Kurt I knew would have fought for his right." She growled in frustration.

Tears began to well in Kurt's eyes and he gulped. "I cannot always be strong! I've been strong all the time! Hell yes I want to be happy! But how when it seems to be my destiny that all the things I've ever wanted always end bad for me." He was really crying now. "I-I want to be with Blaine. I-I want me to be happy...but he's my best friend,Mercedes...and why should he be unhappy too...? If he has the possibility to be happy with some other guys...why shouldn't he...? I-I just...I..."

"Ssh", Mercedes murmured taking him in his arms. "I'm sorry, Kurt. I didn't want to yell at you. Sshh..."

Kurt began to cry even more. "Don't...don't apologize!", he murmured into her pajama. "It's just so unfair..."

She sighed and hugged him even tighter before letting go. "C'mon, let's go upstairs and get into your pajama before Rachel arrives."

Kurt only nodded and went upstairs, quickly changed into his pajama and dried his eyes with his hands.

He just sat on the bed for a few minutes and tried to collect himself. This wasn't really what he'd imagined about an evening with his girls. He sighed.

After a few minutes he heard footsteps on the stairs and got himself ready to be his normal,sarcastic self to face Rachel.

"Hey Kurt", Rachel smiled her too bright smile when she entered the room.

Kurt only waved lazily and smiled lightly at her pink pajama with little pigs on it which she was already wearing.

"So what are we gotta do now?", she asked happily. "Seeing a movie, doing skin care, singing musical songs because I've..."

Mercedes cut into her words. "At first you'll tell me what you've done!"

Rachel just looked confused and Kurt tried to stop Mercedes but she ignored him

"How could you let Blaine exchange numbers with this guy?", Mercedes looked at her an eyebrow raised.

Rachel looked at her like she'd lost her mind. "He was very nice and he-"

Mercedes cut her words again. "Have you, only or a minute, thought about Kurt? About how he would feel about it?"

"Kurt?", Rachel looked only more confused as he gaze rested on Kurt's face. "But why?"

"Because he's totally in love with Blaine and maybe he want Blaine to date him and not another guy!", Mercedes looked angrily.

"Mercedes, it's-", Kurt tried to say but Mercedes raised her hand motioning him to stop talking so he just closed his mouth and watched her with big eyes.

Rachel looked to Kurt in shock. "Really? But how should I've known that, I mean-"

"It was the most obvious thing ever!", Mercedes shook her head and Kurt snorted. "Damn. You're his friend, you should have seen it!"

Rachel looked at Kurt now questioningly. "But why did you tell him to go on that date then?"

"He think he doesn't matter", Mercedes said before Kurt could answer.

Rachel crawled up on the bed to sit next to him and hugged him. "I'm so sorry, Kurt!"

Kurt only shrugged and nodded. He didn't like how this evening went. He wanted to have some distraction and fun! Was this to much to ask for?

"Could,could we just watch a movie or something?", he asked.

Mercedes sighed and nodded, put in a movie and got them some popcorn before sitting down next to Kurt on the bed. They watched the movie and ate their popcorn in silence. Kurt rested his head on Mercedes shoulder and his mind began to wander.

Why did he never have any luck? Why was it like the destiny always turned his back to him? Everything had seemed so perfect when he met Blaine. Maybe too perfect, he thought. Back then he had already pictured Blaine and him being a couple, going out on dates, kissing randomly...Maybe he had been to fast! Maybe he had only been dreaming a little bit to fast...

Kurt woke up early the next day. The two girls still sleeping peacefully next to him. He quietly got up and checked his phone. He had one new message from Blaine:

_Hey,_

_Watcha doing this evening?_

_I'm bored wanna hang out?_

_Text me:)_

Kurt bit his lip. Why hadn't he checked his phone yesterday. Maybe Blaine thought he was angry because he didn't reply to the message. He quickly texted a response:

_Sorry stayed at Mercedes' place tonight_

_and forgot to check my phone!_

_What about hanging out today?:)_

Kurt sighed and put his phone to the side. He could only hoped Blaine still wanted to hang out with him today and wasn't already meeting this guy. Only a few minutes had passed and Kurt's phone buzzed.

_'Kay_

_Should I come over?_

_I could bring some GOOD movies and music;)_

Kurt laughed quietly and responded before he got back under the blanket and tried to sleep for a few minutes.

_Yeah, that would be great:)_

__  
_**Please,please,please guys I need you reviews! It's so important or me!:) Anyway thanks for reading:)**


	8. Chapter 8

It was early in the afternoon when Blaine finally arrived at Kurt's house.

Kurt was busy cooking lunch for his father when the door bell rang. He wiped his hands in the apron he was wearing, fixed his already perfect hair with his hands and opened the door.

Blaine had already been standing a thousand times on his porch but every time he opened the door and saw him there, Kurt was in awe about how amazing he looked. Kurt's heart skipped a beat and he realized how stupid he had to look with his apron.

"Hey there", Blaine greeted him and got inside.

"Hy, Blaine", Kurt smiled and closed the door.

"I've got the movies!", he said and held up his backpack. "Nice apron by the way."

"Uh,I'm..thanks", Kurt said awkwardly and blushed. "I'm actually cooking lunch for my Dad right now and I didn't want my clothes to get dirty."

"It smells pretty good", Blaine said, lifted his head and sniffed.

Kurt laughed and went back into the kitchen. "You can have some too. If you want."

"Thanks. But I already ate.", Blaine stated, sat down at the kitchen counter across from Kurt and rubbed his stomach.

Kurt only grinned. "Never stopped you before!", he said with a wink.

Blaine looked at him with a faked shocked expression, mouth wide open. "How dare you! I'm not fat!"

"I've never said that, Blaine", Kurt grinned and leaned over the counter towards Blaine. "Let's just say: insatiable!"

Blaine's eyes widened and he leaned towards Kurt. "Take that back or-"

"Or what?", Kurt asked grinning brightly. "You can't tickle me here...I mean please I'm cooking with hot water and there's lying a knife around and if you tickle me and I don't watch out..." Kurt playfully shook his head.

"You'll pay for that later!", Blaine grinned and tipped his index finger against Kurt's nose.

Kurt only giggled and ran his hand over his face. "Not if I can prevent it.", he told him smirking.

Blaine looked at him, laughing.

"What?", Kurt asked. "That wasn't even funny!"

"No", Blaine said. "You've got something in your face!"

Kurt put his hand on his cheek. "What? Where?"

Blaine tipped on his own cheek and pointed his finger on the spot. Kurt ran his hand over the pointed spot. Blaine only began to laugh louder.

"No, on the other cheek!", he said giggling.

Kurt ran his hand over the other cheek and looked at Blaine questioningly.

"Still there", Blaine stated and leaned forward. "C'mon"

He ran his thumb over the spot slowly, his eyes fixed on Kurt's. Kurt exhaled a shaky breath, eyes never leaving Blaine's.

After a few seconds Blaine's thumb was gone and Kurt thought that maybe, maybe he could have been wrong about Blaine's feelings towards him and Blaine did like him back. And maybe they could forget about this stupid guy and Kurt's stupid suggestion. Blaine's eyes left Kurt's and Blaine stared at his thumb, shrugged and sucked it into his mouth. Kurt gulped and cleared his throat, trying to sound normal.

"Blaine do you even know what this was?", he asked, eyes wide.

Blaine only shrugged. "Nope, but it tasted good!", he said as if to defend himself.

Kurt pulled a face. "Gross", he said, hiding his grin.

"No, delicious", Blaine said and Kurt rolled his eyes. "Don't look at me like that. You were cooking and had something in your face and I wiped it away and-"

"Ate it!", Kurt completed and shook his head. " You don't even know what that was."

"But it was delicious", Blaine said and pouted. "And it's my mouth not yours."

Kurt laughed. "You're right. Wanna have something to drink to flush that 'something' down?"

Blaine nodded. "You're so mean", he said as Kurt filled two glasses with water.

He handed one of the two Blaine and grinned at him. "That's what you like about me."

Blaine chuckled and began to drink. Kurt put off his apron and turned off the cooker before tacking a sip of the water.

"You know I texted this guy", Blaine suddenly mumbled and Kurt choked. He began to cough and tried to catch his breath but he only coughed more. Blaine hurried to his side and clapped on his back until Kurt stopped coughing.

"Better?", Blaine asked before returning to his chair.

"Yeah", Kurt breathed and cleared his throat. "Much. Thank you. Drank too fast I think."

After a few seconds of silence Kurt asked: "What did you text him?"

Blaine looked at him like he didn't know about what Kurt was speaking.

"The guy from the mall, Blaine", Kurt said, rolling his eyes. "You just told me you texted him."

"Uh,well,yes I asked him to meet me", Blaine shrugged and took his glass in his hands. "Like you told me", he said before taking another sip of the water.

Kurt felt his hoped crash down. So much about forget about this guy and Kurt's suggestion. He sighted quietly and looked to Blaine.

"Did he already answer you?", Kurt asked trying not to sound too curious.

"Yeah", Blaine said. "He suggested to meet tomorrow and go watch a movie."

"Great", Kurt heard himself say with a strange voice.

"Hmm", Blaine hummed. "Sebastian said we could watch this new movie."

Kurt nodded and they fell into a silence.

_Sebastian_. That was the guys name. The name sounded strange out of Blaine's mouth so unfamiliar.

A movie, Kurt thought. In a dark cinema, close to each other. Too close. What if this guy was going to kiss him, Kurt thought and jealously grew inside him. He had always wanted to kiss Blaine but he never had the courage to do it. And now there was this guy, coming into Blaine's life, having the courage to just do what he wanted. To ask the boy out he wanted. But Kurt couldn't blame him for what he wanted. And he also couldn't blame Blaine because maybe without him Blaine hadn't even called that guy. Oh god, Kurt thought, that's all my fault.

Kurt cleared his throat. "Well, what about a movie? Our favorite occupation", he said smiling lightly.

Blaine's face lit up. "Yeah. I've got some you'll like", he said, opening his back.

After they chose a movie, they sat down at the couch with some snacks. Blaine was eating popcorn and Kurt leaned his head on the other boy's shoulder like he always did.

"I thought you already ate", Kurt said, smirking.

"Oh, shut up", Blaine said nudging him playfully with his elbow.

Kurt didn't really pay attention to the movie and the fact that Blaine began to rest his cheek on Kurt's head wasn't helping either. They'd sat like that a lot. Mostly every time they'd watched a movie together. But Kurt couldn't loose the thought that this could be the last time. Because if Sebastian would be Blaine's boyfriend, they couldn't do this anymore. At this thought of Sebastian, Kurt didn't know him but he was already hating him, and Blaine as boyfriends his stomach clenched. Kurt sighed and snuggled closer to Blaine. If that would be the last time, he should enjoy it, shouldn't he?

Kurt couldn't sleep that night. He was lying in his bed for hours just staring up to the ceiling and hoping sleep to come. But I didn't. Kurt had too many thoughts in his head and he just couldn't stop thinking about Blaine and this guy, no, _Sebastian _he reminded himself.

Would Blaine still spent time with Kurt if he had a boyfriend? Would they still be best friends and be spending all their time with watching movies and going to coffee shops? Probably they would stay best friends and Kurt definitely hoped so. But spending all their time together? That wouldn't be possible anymore and Kurt already began to miss it.

As Blaine had left this evening, they had hugged extra long and extra tight and Kurt had tried to just enjoy it because maybe Blaine wouldn't even want to hug him anymore if he had a boyfriend.

Kurt sighed and got up from the bed. He wasn't tired at all. He walked towards the window and pressed his forehead against the cold glass. It was raining outside and streams of water were running down the window from the outside.

Why couldn't his life just for one time be good? Why couldn't he have a little bit of luck? Why seemed life to hate him this much?

Kurt stood at the window for what felt like hours. His tears building their own streams, running down the glass.

**Thanks for the nice reviews I already got for this story:) But please don't stop reviewing...It means a lot to me that some people really seem to like this story :P**


	9. Chapter 9

Kurt was lying on his bed staring to the ceiling.

So it was really happening: Blaine was watching a movie. With Sebastian. In a dark theater. Right now. Would Sebastian try to kiss Blaine? Would Blaine let Sebastian kiss him?

Kurt's stomach clenched and he felt sick, like really sick. Like he'd have to vomit. He sighed and got off the bed. It was already dawning outside and it was dark in Kurt's bedroom. He checked his phone. Still no new message. Shouldn't be Blaine home by now? Wouldn't he be calling Kurt when he was home? Should Kurt call him?

Kurt's head felt empty and his stomach began to hurt even more. Maybe he should just go to bed and wait for Blaine to call him. Kurt got himself ready for bed and did his skin care. He took his phone in his hand, went over to the window and took a seat on the window sill. He looked at his phone one last time and turned it off. He leaned his forehead against the cool glass of the window and looked outside. It was dark now and it was raining, the sky was heavy with clouds.

Maybe he could sit here all night. Kurt enjoyed the cold of the window against his too warm forehead. Maybe it would also make the feeling of sickness go away.

Kurt just sat there for minutes, forehead still pressed against the glass, eyes closed. He began to shiver from the cold so he got up and decided to go to bed instead. He got under the blanket which already felt to warm so he unwrapped himself again and sighed. He closed his eyes and waited for sleep to come but it didn't. Images of Sebastian, Kurt didn't even know what he looked like but in his imagination he was absolutely gorgeous, kissing Blaine crossed his mind every time he tried to keep his eyes shut. So Kurt just lay there in silence, staring into the darkness with tears welling in his eyes. He hated to cry but nobody was there who could see him, nobody was there who wanted him to be strong. So he just let the tears blur his vision and run down his cheeks. He just cried quietly, lying there in the dark until his exhaustion took over him and he fell asleep, his cheeks still wet with tears.

As Kurt woke up the next morning, he felt terrible. Everything hurt. His stomach was still clenching painfully, the feeling of sickness was still there and he had a very bad headache. And everything felt ever more worse than yesterday. Kurt moaned in pain and held his hand in front of his eyes to avoid the contact with the light from the window. He didn't feel like getting up so he just closed his eyes again and drifted back to sleep.

_Kurt was standing in a beautiful garden. The sun was shinning warmly down at him and he felt uncomfortable warm in his black suit. Wait, why was he wearing a suit? He looked at the suit more closely. This was definitely a Alexander McQueen suit, he thought, so this had to be something special. He looked around and saw a lot of people standing there in suits and nice dresses. He was still looking around when suddenly Tina appeared in front of him, herself wearing a beautiful purple dress._

"_Kurt", she called. "We need to go inside!"_

_Before Kurt could ask anything she dragged him inside. Inside -a church- Kurt realized surprised. What should he do in a church? He didn't go to church, he didn't even believe in God. So why was he here?_

_But at the moment he was inside, he realized why he was here. The church was full. Kurt could see everyone from the Glee club and even a few teachers. Everyone was dressed nicely and looked excited. A few little girls stood at the beginning of the long carpet with little baskets which had flowers in it._

_This had to be a wedding, Kurt realized. But who was going to get married? He? No, then he wouldn't be here already. He looked around but he still had no idea._

"_Kurt", Tina called again and Kurt looked at her. "We've to go to the altar where the other witness are standing! Come on!"_

_Witness. He was a witness for a marriage but for whom? He followed Tina towards the altar and stood with her on the one side of it. On the other side were standing two boys he didn't know. He looked to the people sitting in the church. He was surprised as he saw his Dad, Finn and Carole sitting there as well. What were they doing here? Who could the person who would get married today be?_

_But at the moment the music began and everyone turned to the entrance, he already knew the answer before seeing the person. A young man was walking inside with a woman on his arm. _

_It was Blaine. And, Kurt guessed, his mother. In Kurt's imagination she looked just like Blaine. She had the same eyes, the same tanned skin and the same curly hair. _

_Blaine would get married today. To someone who wasn't him, Kurt realized and gulped. His stomach began to hurt and he began to feel sick. Blaine and his mother went slowly towards the altar until Blaine got up the stairs and stood next to him. He smiled widely down at him and Kurt pulled a grimace as he tried to smile back through his pain. _

_Kurt looked to the entrance again where another boy, blonde and tall and definitely good looking, came towards the altar. He also had a woman on one of his arms. She was blonde and as gorgeous as her son. When they arrived at the stairs, the boy stood next to Blaine in front of the priest. Blaine smiled at him and took his hand. Kurt felt a sharp pain in his heard as he watched the two boy which looked lovingly at each other. When the priest began to speak, Kurt caught an evil glance from the blonde boy before he looked to the priest. Kurt's breath caught in his throat and he heard the priest only quietly through the clouds in his head._

"_Today we came here to dispose Mr Blaine Anderson and Mr Sebastian Smith of in marriage. We..."_

_That was the last thing Kurt heard before his legs couldn't hold him anymore and he fell to the ground. His vision was black and everything hurt._

"_ ", someone called but he didn't care he just wanted to lay here and never get up again._

"_Kurt", someone began to shook his shoulders._

"Kurt", the voice said. "What's wrong?"

Kurt slowly began to open his eyes and his vision cleared. His Dad was standing in front of him, looking down at him with a worried expression.

"Is everything alright?", Burt asked. "Did you have a nightmare? And why are you still in bed? You normally would've gotten up hours ago!"

A nightmare. Kurt sighed. It had been a dream. A terrible dream. But still only a dream. Blaine wasn't going to get married to that Sebastian and he hadn't to be witness.

"I just don't feel very well", Kurt said, his head hurting terribly.

"You look very pale.", his Dad commented. "Well, paler than normally. Can I get you something?"

"No", Kurt said tiredly. "I just want to sleep. Maybe it'll get better after another nap."

Burt smiled sadly. "Okay, sleep well", he said and closed the door.

Kurt sighed deeply and closed his eyes again because his head began to hurt even more from the light coming through the curtains. It didn't took long until Kurt drifted to sleep again.

Kurt woke up by a knock on his door. He opened his eyes slowly and saw his father standing at the door.

"Uhm, are you feeling better?", Burt asked and Kurt only shrugged. "Blaine asked if he could visit you!"

Blaine. Kurt felt shocked. He forgot to turn on his phone in the morning and he forgot about Blaine's date. His stomach clenched. He decided that he could call Blaine later.

"Hm, I don't really feel like seeing anyone now", Kurt mumbled looking down at himself. "I've to look terrible!"

Burt laughed lightly. "You look like you're ill! Because that's what you are!", he said and shrugged. "Okay, I just tell him that you really don't feel well and he could come back tomorrow."

Burt was on his way to close the door when Kurt said: "Wait, Blaine is here?"

Burt shrugged again. "Standing outside on the front porch at the moment."

Kurt sighed and tried to smile. "Then tell him to come in."

"You sure?", Burt asked looking unconvinced.

Kurt only nodded and Burt got out of the room and closed the door. Kurt quickly grabbed the little mirror on his nightstand and stared at himself. He looked like crap. And even paler than usual. He sighed and before he could think of anything he could do, he heard a soft knock on the door, before it opened. Blaine was standing in the doorway, looking a little bit unsure if he should stay there or come in.

Kurt tried to smile. "Hey", he said, motioning Blaine to take a seat on his bed.

"Uhm, hey", Blaine said, closed the door and seated himself on the edge of the bed and looked at Kurt. "Is it really okay for you that I'm here? If you don't feel well I can come back tomorrow or-"

Kurt held his hand up. "It's okay, really.", he smiled. "I couldn't send you away when you come to visit me. Even if I look like living hell!" Kurt laughed quietly.

Blaine only sat closer to him and took his hand. "You look like you're not feeling well. That's everything." Blaine squeezed his hand and smiled sweetly.

Kurt heart began to beat faster and he smiled back. "C'mon, I know how I look! I've got a mirror on my nightstand.", he told Blaine. "You don't have to make me feel better."

Blaine grinned. "Okay, you look like crap.", he said smirking.

Kurt opened his mouth in played shock. "How dare you? You just can't tell an ill person that he looks like crap. You just can't." And with this he took one of his pillows and bashed it on Blaine's head.

Blaine laughed. "Stop it!", he said still laughing. "I was only joking! Of course you don't look like crap! I don't think you're even able to look bad because you always manage to look good."

Kurt snorted at that looking down at their entwined hands. He squeezed Blaine's hand before letting go to drink some of the water his Dad must have brought him.

"So, how was your date?", Kurt asked a little bit curious.

Blaine immediately looked down in his lap. "It-it was nice.", he said still looking down. "The movie was great. We should watch it together sometimes." He hesitantly looked up to Kurt and smiled.

"Hmm", Kurt hummed in response. Didn't Blaine want to tell him about the date? "Was he nice?", Kurt asked looking to Blaine.

Blaine looked a little bit lost like his mind had wandered and Kurt had to bit his lip trying not to smile. "Who do- Oh,oh you mean Sebastian. Yeah, he's nice", Blaine smiled shyly and looked everywhere but Kurt's eyes.

"Did he kiss you?", Kurt asked before he could stop himself.

Blaine looked at him, his eyes wide in surprise. "Uhm, he-he actually tried to but...I told him that I wasn't ready for that yet and he was okay with that", Blaine said blushing.

Kurt gulped. Sebastian had really tried to kiss Blaine. Kurt had wanted to do this for month but he hadn't had the courage and this Sebastian just did what he felt like. Kurt felt anger welling inside of him. This Sebastian couldn't just steel Blaine's first kiss like it was nothing. He couldn't just kiss Blaine!

Yes, he could, Kurt realized because Blaine hadn't got a boyfriend and that meant that in fact Sebastian could kiss Blaine if he wanted. Kurt gulped again.

Kurt realized that they had been sitting there in silence.

"Are you-are you...", Kurt cleared his throat before continuing. "Are you two going to meet again?", he asked.

Blaine looked at him surprised. "Well, he actually asked me to meet him at the mall on Monday.", Blaine said. "I didn't agree yet, I still have to text him."

Kurt chewed his lip. "Great", he heard himself saying. "So,uhm, movie?", he asked and Blaine's face lid up.

"Yeah, I actually brought a few movies", he got up from the bed and took them out. "Which one do you want?"

Kurt laughed. "You're the expert! I chose the one you like the most!", he told him smiling.

Blaine nodded, a big smile on his face. He put in the movie before sitting down next to Kurt on the bed. They just sat there like they always did. Close to each other, Kurt's head dropping down to Blaine's shoulder after a while. He immediately felt better and his head felt lighter.

Kurt sighed. Maybe not everything would change, if Blaine would continue to date Sebastian.

**So,as always, please tell me what you think about it! Thanks for reading. (If you want to follow me on twitter → stilllovinggaga , I'll follow back!:))**


	10. Chapter 10

It had been a few weeks since Blaine had had his first date with Sebastian. They had gone out on a few other dates but Kurt didn't exactly know how much they saw each other because Blaine didn't really talk to him about Sebastian. The only thing he knew was that Blaine was still seeing him.

Kurt thought he should be thankful that Blaine didn't talk much about Sebastian and about how great he was and how good he kissed (Kurt still felt a sharp pain every time he thought about Blaine kissing Sebastian but he managed not to think about it too much. And Kurt just knew Sebastian and Blaine had kissed even if they'd never actually talked about it). But the fact that Blaine didn't want to talk about Sebastian did also bother Kurt: He and Blaine were best friends and weren't best friends supposed to talk about everything to each other? He still was Blaine's best friend, wasn't he? He didn't even know if Blaine and Sebastian were actually boyfriends because he and Blaine had never talked about this either...and best friends should talk about something like that, shouldn't they?

Their relationship hadn't really changed that much. They still spent a lot of their free and school time together but not as much as before the Blaine-Sebastian thing started. They still had lazy afternoons together in which they just hung out or watched movies. But when they weren't as close to each other as they had been before. They didn't sat together on the bed, heads on each others shoulders or hand entwined. They didn't hug too long or just sat there staring at each other. But Kurt couldn't blame Blaine for this because it was him,Kurt, who had stopped the whole cuddling-thing. He just thought that now since Blaine had Sebastian it wouldn't be right anymore and Blaine didn't want to do it anymore. So Kurt just tried to stay away from Blaine and to give him his space. Even if he didn't like it. Sometimes Kurt felt tempted to just cuddle to Blaine and never let him go again. But he knew he couldn't. Because Blaine wasn't his and he wasn't Blaine's!

He had accepted this by now but there were still nights when he cried himself to sleep and he was so unhappy that he just didn't want to get up again. His father had noticed the change in Kurt's and Blaine's relationship, Kurt's unhappiness and how tired he looked in the morning. But he'd stopped asking after Kurt had told him that they had just a lot of school work and he had to work on it very long. Kurt was sure that his dad didn't believe him but he'd stopped asking after Kurt had lied to him. Maybe he saw that Kurt didn't want to talk about it and he knew that Kurt could handle it on his own like he always did. But there were moments when Kurt just wanted to tell everything to someone. To someone who wouldn't judge him and someone who wouldn't say something like "I told you so but you didn't listen!". Of course he could talk to Mercedes or even to Rachel but they just didn't understand him. Mercedes thought Kurt should just tell Blaine what he felt and she didn't understand why he couldn't. And in fact Kurt avoided to talk about Blaine with her. Or with Rachel. He avoided to talk about Blaine to anyone. Because mostly he just didn't want to talk about him. But then there were this moments when he needed someone to tell. Someone who was like Blaine: understanding and caring. Always listening and with a solution. But he couldn't talk to Blaine about this. And he hated it.

It was Monday morning and Kurt just got out of his Navigator as two of the jocks pushed him against it and he fell, together with his books, to the ground. He looked at them with an evil glance but they just laughed and high-fived. Kurt sighed and leaned his head back on his car. He just sat there for minutes not having the force to get up while students crossed the parking lot in front of him. Some of them ignoring him or throwing him glances. Suddenly someone stopped directly in front of him and held his hand out. Kurt looked up. Blaine was standing there, smiling lightly down at him. Kurt hated how his heart began to beat faster every time he saw Blaine. How much he laughed his smile and his eyes and his bow ties.

"A little pause before school starts?", Blaine asked his hand still in front of Kurt.

"No, a rough start. Some of the jocks pushed me. Again", Kurt said and took Blaine's hand who pulled him to his feet. Kurt clapped the dirt from his cloths and Blaine collected Kurt's books from the ground. "Thanks", Kurt said when Blaine handed him the books and smiled warmly.

They began to walk towards the school building, talking excitedly about their weekend, just enjoying each others company.

When Kurt had finished his last lesson this day, he went straight to the choir room to attend Glee club. He was one of the first to arrive and sat down on his usually chair. After a few minutes Mercedes and Tina arrived and sat down next to him. They were caught in a heated conversation so Mercedes only waved her hand as a greeting. Blaine arrived together with the rest of the club and Mr Schuester. Blaine sat down next to Kurt as always and they greeted each other. When every member was sitting Mr Schuester clapped his hands.

"Hello guys!", he said. "We have a lot things to discuss about nationals! But before we start: Blaine it's your turn. You can start with your song!"

Kurt then realized that he had forgotten that Blaine was going to sing today. He also forgot to ask him which song he had chosen. Kurt chewed his lip. He suddenly felt like a bad friend for being to distracted with his own problems to remember things which were important for Blaine.

Blaine got up from his seat and stood a little self-conscious in front of the New Directions.

"Well, normally I would sing something like Pink or Katy Perry but not today", he said, taking a deep breath. "I chose this song because I really like it and it kind of helped me through a rough time."

Before Kurt could even think about something Blaine could mean by "rough time" the music began to play and Blaine began to sing.

_Take me down to the river-bend.  
Take me down to the fighting end.  
Wash the poison from off my skin.  
Show me how to be whole again._

_Fly me up on a silver wing.  
Past the black where the sirens sing.  
Warm me up in the nova's glow.  
And drop me down to the drain below._

Blaine's voice matched perfectly with the song and Kurt was stunned by the intensity of the lyrics. When the refrain started Blaine's voice got stronger and it was like he really felt what he sang.

_Cause I'm only a crack in this Castle of Glass.  
Hardly anything left for you to see.  
For you to see._

The song went on and Kurt was like totally hypnotized by Blaine's voice.

_Bring me home in a blinding dream.  
Through the secrets that I have seen.  
Wash the sorrow from off my skin  
and show me how to be whole again. _

_Cause I'm only a crack in this Castle of Glass.  
Hardly anything left for you to see.  
For you to see._

_Cause I'm only a crack in this Castle of Glass.  
Hardly anything else I need to be._

_Cause I'm only a crack in this Castle of Glass.  
Hardly anything left for you to see.  
For you to see._

The song ended then and everyone began to clap. Blaine smiled lightly and bowed. But Kurt thought that his smile almost looked a little bit sad when he sat back down next to Kurt.

"That-that...", Kurt began. "was really nice! You're voice and the song matched perfectly."

Blaine smiled his little sad smile. "Thanks. The song really means a lot to me."

He didn't say anything more and then Mr Schuester began to talk about Nationals and everyone joined in the conversation. Kurt only sat there without saying anything, deep in his thoughts about what Blaine meant with "rough time".

Later that day Kurt went to the mall together with Mercedes. Prom was in a week and she wanted Kurt to help her with her dress. They went into a small shop with nice dresses and Kurt decided that Mercedes should wear purple and looked through a few dresses.

"So, what are you going to wear?", Mercedes asked, sounding excited.

"I'm not going", Kurt said, still looking through the dresses.

"What do you mean, you're not going?", Mercedes asked. Kurt guessed that she was raising an eyebrow when she said it but he didn't turn around to prove it.

"I mean...", Kurt said and picked out a beautiful purple dress. "...that I won't go to the prom" He said, turned around and handed the dress to a disbelieving looking Mercedes. "Try this! The color is beautiful and I bet it'll fit perfectly!"

Mercedes took the dress without looking at it. "But it's prom!", she said like it'd be an argument.

"Well, yeah it is", Kurt said rolling his eyes. "Now try the dress" He dragged Mercedes towards the changing room.

Mercedes got into the the dressing room and closed the curtain. "But you've to go", she continued. "Why aren't you going?"

Kurt sighed and sat down on a chair in front of the dressing rooms. "I don't have a date and I definitely don't want to go there alone! I'll just stay at home instead...watch a movie or something."

Kurt didn't want to admit that it wasn't only the fact that he didn't want to go alone. He also didn't want to see Blaine together with Sebastian because Kurt was sure Blaine would bring Sebastian with him.

Mercedes, now wearing the purple dress, got out of the dressing room and looked at Kurt. "But Kurt, you've to come! It'll be fun and we could stay together the whole evening and-"

"No, you go with Sam and I would only disturb you two", Kurt said and dragged Mercedes in front of one of the mirrors. "Wow, it fits perfectly like I said! You look like a queen." He clapped his hands.

"Kurt, you're my best friend and you would never disturb me", she said taking his hand. "I don't want you to sit alone at home when everyone else is having fun!"

Kurt sighed. "It's okay. Really.", he said and squeezed her hand. "In fact I never really liked prom." That was a lie. He'd always dreamed about his first prom and about what he was going to wear and with whom he was going...

Mercedes looked at him with her "Bitch please" expression. "Oh Kurt, I know that you're lying", she told him. "I know you well enough to know that!"

Kurt only snorted and suddenly Mercedes face lit up.

"What if I find a date for you?", she asked excited.

Kurt only snorted again. "You won't!"

Mercedes grinned at him. "If I'll find a date for you, you'll come to prom! Deal?"

Kurt thought about it for a moment. Mercedes wouldn't find a date for him so he could agree only to make her happy. "Deal", he said and shrugged.

Mercedes smiled widely at him. "Great! Well I'll think I'll buy that dress! It's nice and if I began now I've more time to find a date for you!", she said and got back into the dressing room.

Kurt only rolled his eyes on her enthusiasm.

**Yeah, that was chapter 10. As always:Tell me what you think;)**

**(The song was "Castle of glass" from Linkin Park (Album:Living Things))**


	11. Chapter 11

It was the evening of prom and Kurt was lying on his bed, reading the latest Vogue.

Mercedes hadn't called. Kurt mostly wasn't surprised that she hadn't found a date for him, he even felt a bit relieved because he could never know what kind of guy she would bring to him. But he felt also a tiny bit of disappointment. Of course he wanted to go to prom and of course he wanted to have a date. But it seemed like actually there was nobody who wanted to go to prom with him.

Kurt sighed and got up from the bed to get something to eat and drink and start a movie marathon. He was halfway downstairs when he heard his phone ringing. So he went back into his room and looked at the screen of his mobile phone. He got one new message.

_Found a date for you. _

_Get in your dancing shoes, he'll be there in an hour._

_And you know deal is deal, there's no turning back now;)_

_Love ya. Mercedes._

Kurt stared on the screen for minutes before realizing what the text really meant.

He'd got a date. He'd got a date with a guy!

Kurt let out a tiny squeal of happiness, realizing how much he'd really wanted to go to prom. But how should he get ready in an hour? He still had to do his hair and choose an outfit. Kurt quickly opened his dresser and looked through it. After looking hectically through it for nearly fifteen minutes, he decided to wear black pants, a white shirt, a black skin tight vest and a black bow tie. He got dressed quickly, satisfied with his work. He then went into his bathroom to fix his hair. Checking the clock, he saw that he only had half an hour left and he wasn't sure if that would be enough time. When he was satisfied, he checked his phone and saw that he'd only ten minutes left. He hurried down the stairs and into the kitchen. His father and Carole where out for dinner, so Kurt decided to drop a note for them. He hurried back into the hall and got into his best shoes. He just was done with the second shoe when the door bell rang. Looking into the mirror one last time, he stepped towards the door and opened it, taking a deep breath.

On his front porch was standing a guy, a guy in a black suit, a black bow tie and with a white rose in his buttonhole which matched his white shirt. The boy had dark, gelled hair and-

The boy was Blaine, Kurt realized.

"Blaine!", Kurt said, staring at him open mouthed.

Blaine just stood there awkwardly and smiled at him. "Uhm, hey Kurt!"

After Kurt just stood there, looking at Blaine without saying anything, Blaine cleared his throat. "Are you-are you ready to go...ühm Mercedes said I should pick you up in a few minutes but I thought I maybe should come a little earlier...so:here I am." He laughed nervously.

Kurt lightly shook his head, considering what to say. "Well,yeah. I'm ready!", he said in a rush, stepping out of the house and closing the door behind him.

"You look amazing by the way...", Blaine said and looked at him, his cheeks a little pink.

Kurt blushed. "Uh,thank you!", he said. "You look-you look pretty good yourself."

A smiley spread on Blaine's face and he reached into his pocket. "Oh, I nearly forgot", he said, taking out a small white rose. The same white rose he was wearing, Kurt realized and his heart began to beat faster.

Blaine looked at him questioningly. "Should I-could I...", he nodded towards Kurt's vest.

Kurt only nodded and Blaine stepped closer to put the rose into the buttonhole of Kurt's vest. Kurt held his breath. Blaine smelled unbelievable good and he was so close,so close... Kurt exhaled a shaky breath when Blaine stepped back.

"Tha-thanks", Kurt mumbled, looking down at the white rose on his vest.

Blaine motioned towards his car. "Should we..uhm...go then?", he asked.

Kurt only managed to nod and climbed into Blaine's car. They rode in silence. Neither of them knowing what to say. In fact Kurt had a lot to say or ask but he didn't know if the moment was right for it so he just waited. When they arrived at McKinley High-school, Blaine jumped out of the car to open the door of the car for Kurt. Kurt blushed and smiled at Blaine who looked at him shyly. They then went into the school, where a lot of people were already dancing. They decided to sit down at one table and Blaine got them something to drink. Kurt saw Mercedes in the crowd, dancing with Sam. Kurt decided to talk to her later.

Why had she told Blaine to go to prom with him? And why was Blaine going with Kurt? Where was Sebastian?

Kurt's head was full of questions but he didn't know how to ask them so he stayed silent when Blaine came back with their drinks. He sat down next to Kurt and they drank in silence. Not that they actually had the possibility to talk: The music was so loud, you couldn't really hear your own word. When Kurt had finished his drink, he decided that he really should ask Blaine a few things. So he motioned with his head towards the door and Blaine nodded. They got outside in the school yard then and Kurt took a seat on one of the benches. Blaine sat down next to him hesitantly. Kurt just sat there for a moment without saying anything, shivering a little bit from the cold air. Before he could even think about how stupid he'd been not take a jacket with him, Blaine took of his jacket and put it over Kurt's shoulders. Kurt only stared at him and blushed.

"Tha-thank you", he mumbled and looked to the ground.

Blaine shrugged. "No problem", he said but Kurt could hear his nervousness in his words.

After another moment in silence Kurt couldn't hold it any longer. "Why are you going on prom with me and not with Sebastian?", Kurt asked before he could stop himself.

Blaine only looked at him and took a deep breath. "I'm not dating Sebastian any longer."

Kurt looked at him confused. "Why not?", he asked.

Blaine looked at the ground. "He wanted more than I wanted. He always pushed me to kiss him or do that or-", Blaine trailed off.

"But-but you said he was okay with you not wanting to kiss him!", Kurt said in shock.

"Yeah, I know I said that", Blaine said still looking at the ground. "I lied he wasn't okay at all with it."

"What did he do?", Kurt asked, taking Blaine's hand.

Blaine looked at their hands and then up into Kurt's face. "He tried to force me but I didn't want to. So he just left me alone and told me that he'd expected something better when he'd met me."

Kurt's eyes were wide in shock. "But why did you keep dating him...and give him what he wanted?", Kurt asked, looking into Blaine's eyes. "Did you really like him that much that you-"

"No", Blaine cut into his words. "I didn't like him at all! I've never liked him! I just dated him because-because of you."

Kurt looked at Blaine like he'd lost his mind but before he could say anything Blaine continued, squeezing Kurt's hand.

"You always were so happy for me...", Blaine said his voice shaking. "It-it broke my heart...and I just wanted to make you happy...so I-"

"Wait", Kurt said locking eyes with Blaine. "Why did it break you heart?"

Blaine looked at him, tears in his eyes. He suddenly got up from the bench. "What do you think?", he yelled. "What do you think why it broke my heart? Because I'm in love with you! But I've never had the courage to admit it! And then you were so happy for me for dating another guy! And it broke my heart because I realized that you'd never felt anything for me! It was only in my imagination!"

Blaine began to sob and Kurt just sat there eyes wide in shock. It took him a few minutes to wrap his mind around what Blaine had just said: He was in love with him. With _him_. They both were in love with each other and had tried to make the other one happy with something that made neither of them happy. It was absurd and Kurt couldn't help but laugh at that. He felt insane and Blaine just looked at him with disbelieve, tears running down his checks before he turned around and began to run away. Kurt got up quickly from the bench and ran after Blaine.

"Blaine,Blaine", he called. "Wait! Please!"

Blaine suddenly stopped and turned around. "Why?", he yelled, sounding angry and hurt at the same time. "Do you want to laugh at me and my feelings some more?"

Kurt took both of Blaine's hand in his and Blaine looked at him. It broke Kurt's heart to see him like this. "I'm sorry, Blaine. I know that you think I laughed about you but I didn't! Do you let me explain?"

Blaine nodded after standing in silence for a few seconds.

"I laughed at the whole situation. It's just so absurd.", Kurt said softly.

Blaine looked at him, looking angry again. "Why? Because I fell in love with my best friend and he doesn't feel the same for me? You're right that's really funny!I-"

"Sssh", Kurt said and squeezed Blaine's hand who tried to pull away. "I laughed because I fell in love with my best friend too and I also thought he wouldn't feel the same way", Kurt said, a soft smile on his lips.

Blaine only looked at him confused. "You mean-you-I..."

Kurt took a deep breath. "I love you, Blaine! I've always loved you but I've never had the courage to admit it", he smiled at him sadly, tears welling in his eyes.

Blaine stared at him eyes wide with surprise and disbelieve. "But why-why did you want me to date Sebastian?Why did you...", Blaine trailed off, tears still running down his checks.

Kurt suddenly felt his own tears on his checks and could hardly speak. "Be-because you're my best friend and I-I wanted you to be happy!...And I-I thought Se-Sebastian would make you happy...and you should be happy so-"

Before Kurt could say anything more Blaine took him in his arms and hugged him tightly. Kurt buried his face between Blaine's neck and shoulders and began to sob loudly. After a few minutes Blaine pulled away a bit and looked Kurt in the eyes.

"I love you, Kurt", he said, voice nothing more than a whisper.

Kurt looked at him, feeling his heart swell in his chest. " I love you too, Blaine."

And with that, Blaine leaned in and closed the gap between them. Before Kurt could think about anything to do, he felt Blaine's soft lips on his and he was lost. The kiss was soft but confident and Kurt hummed again Blaine's lips in contentment, not bothered by the salty taste from their tears which had mixed on their faces.

**As always:please tell me what you think!**

**I won't be able to upload for a few weeks because I'll go on a vacation and I won't have a computer with me or any internet. So please be patient! But I'll definitely continue the story;)**


	12. Reasons

**I'm so sorry guys!**

**I know I told you, I would definitely continue this but after I got back from my vacation school started again and I have a lack of inspiration! Since the new school year started and I'm in eleventh grade (still 2 more to go to my abitur) I'm at school a lot of time and have a lot of homework! Everyday I think I should write and continue this but I really don't have the time and inspiration at the moment! Maybe,maybe I'll continue this in the future, when everything at school calms down or the holidays in fall start! I hope you'll understand my reason! You know it takes me a lot of time to write chapters with more than 2000 words...(not to mention the fact that I'm a seventeen year old girl and english isn't even my first language!;))**

**I'm planning to write one shots some time in the futur because I think it's better if I don't have the pressure to continue even if I really liked writing...most of the time;D**

**So I really hope you'll understand and you're going to read my one shots when I write them! Thank you all for you nice reviews and your reads! **

**See you soon guys!:)**


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